what the hell happened to the last month?

Oh yea, I tried to finish my class. Splendid.

I've been limping around the past 3 weeks. Doc said that the baby was stretching some of my ligaments. I'm going to really have to try not to give this kid a guilt trip for what he puts me through. Crikey, I know that some people have had it much much worse, but give me a break. I'm only telling you the PG stuff anyway.

The baby is still Alfonz, but now Chris calls my expanding stomach "Leon". It gets confusing.

I believe I have developed RLS (restless leg syndrome, an apparenlty new "syndrome" that both Chris and I made fun of when doctors put a medical term to something we called "Charlie Baer leg").

Also, vertigo is much fun. I successfully went from the 2nd floor to the 3rd floor on that open escalator at the Macy's in the Galleria by leaning forward and closing my eyes. But I had to take the elevator to go back down. I also couldn't lean on the railings in the mall that overlooked the first floor. I used to not mind heights, now they scare me silly.

Alfonz is the size of a kit-kat bar. I can actually eat food now (still no tomato sauce). I still can't tell if I'm showing or it's still the same ol' round stomach I've always had.

Merry Christmas!!!!

Am I showing or is it belly fat?

I have never had a flat stomach and am resigned that I never will. I have a wonderful husband who holds one sided conversations with my stomach right now anyway, so if that doesn't gross him out I'm okay with it.

Chris says I'm showing. I can't tell if I am or it's just the same rounded stomach I've always had.

I burp a hell of a lot more now. I think I would make my little brother proud.

Today is officially 2nd Trimester, and apparently "peach" according to a website. It still seems too damn small to be making me feel this bad. And Alfonz is not happy with me today for some reason. Maybe he's celebrating his own little accomplishments, for making it to the next stage of fetalhood. Whatever he's doing, it's making me... really..... tired..........

Old ladies in church

Chris and I were prodded out of our pew in church yesterday. We went to a different church than usual, and sat in one of the short pews in the back (you can get into in on both sides). We were sitting on the left side, when a lady just started coming in our pew from the left side, so we scooted down to the other side, wondering what the hell that was about. I think we stole her usual seat. She could have just gone around. Then she flashed the "peace" symbol during the sign of peace. Some people.

I am weak weak weak. I'm afraid to go to the gym and try walking on the treadmill; I couldn't even stand up in church for more than 10 minutes. I looked at all the little old ladies calmly kneeling and standing at all the right parts and felt like a complete and utter wuss.

I'm reading those silly Twilight books, and I'm going to the silly movie.

12 weeks

Nothing interesting. My teeth hurt. can babies make your teeth hurt? I've never had a cavity, so I don't know how it feels.

Just found out that out of the 5 women in my wedding party, 3 of us are pregnant and due May-July. Huzzah for family life! And prayers for healthy pregnancies and babies for me and my friends.

Also, no one seems to have "expectant mother parking" anymore. That figures. Just in time for me to be able to utilize it.

Post Script
Got the flu shot, felt really really queasy a few hours after, but at this point that could be anything. My friend said that her friend blames her premature pregnancy on the flu shot. Great!!!! I think I do have a cavity. I get a cavity for the first time when I'm almost 30. Need to quickly find a dentist. I probably can't get it drilled anyway. I don't think I can have Novacaine (sp?). Icky.

Holy crap I'm a mom

Y'know, sometimes it just takes time for that kind of stuff to hit you. I’m not “going to be a mom”, I am a mom. That little “ball of cells” as some so eloquently put it is my baby, with a heartbeat little fingers and toes, eyes that see and ears that hear, and a blessed little soul. Even if God decides to take Alfonz away before s/he is born, Chris and I are still parents because we have a child.

I did not expect another ultrasound on Wednesday. I had mentioned that it's hard to "feel" pregnant when you don't show and you aren't sick all the time like you used to be. The doc said he might not be able to hear the heartbeat using an abdominal scan at 11 weeks. Chris said I looked terrified, and I guess the doc wanted to calm me down or something, because I ended up getting another one.

Boy that sucker is getting huge! And it looks like the poor guy is running out of space. I think the most amazing part was watching him occasionally kick a little bit and wave his arms. Wow.

By the way, don't anyone get start yelling sexist at me. I refuse to call my baby "it", so my baby will be he, his, or him, until the January ultrasound (sometimes I refer to him as Alfonz). A gender confused girl is much easier to remedy than a gender confused boy (Chris is still obsessed with his hair, terrified of bugs, and in love with Captain Kirk, so it's taken over 30 years without a cure for him. Plus he doesn't own any tools).

Yesterday morning I fell on my bum getting out of the shower. I’m ok, and it seems baby is okay, but it was a little scary. Alfonz is small enough and cushioned enough that a fall on my rump probably didn’t even jostle him. Daddy sang a song to him when I got home in case he was still a little shaken up.

Well, here are the latest pictures. I call the bottom one the "Face of Boe" (only recognizable if you are a Dr. Who fan). At first I thought my child might be a Jawa, but it turns out I was looking at the shadows wrong. I decided that since the nose is already visible the baby must have Chris' Polish features. His large Polish nose that sounds like a foghorn when he blows it (which is quite often).

I’m not going to bother most of my coworkers with my joyous news anymore. One sweet lady said that Face of Boe looked like a blob or an alien head. Another coworker chimed in by telling me that she thinks all newborns are ugly. These are the wonderful people I work with.

You see Alfonz’s baby head and the upper par t his torso. If you have trouble seeing him, make the picture smaller. Face of Boe is best looked at small. Blowing him up only makes him harder to see.

Sick sick sick

Can't I have just one day where I feel well? Where I don't have a cold (thanks to Chris), nasty allergies (new to me), and this kid (again, thanks to Chris)? I also sick of feeling so weak. I walk through the mall or in the grocery store and have to keep finding a seat for a bit. Ugh. I feel like a wuss. Plus I can't do laundry or lift heavy boxes. I wonder if I can go bowling at the company Christmas (excuse me, winter holiday) party this year.

My appetite is back again, for now. More fried chicken and mashed potatoes. Chris is thrilled; he normally is not allowed such things.

I went to the doctor for my nasty cold on Monday, and found out in 2 months I weight exactly the same. So, despite the growing mass of cells in my belly, I must have lost other weight due to not eating. It should be a new diet craze!

I'm reading again - without having to smoke. (I used to associate reading with smoking so much I couldn't do one without the other). Now I've started twirling my hair instead. I'll have ringlets by Christmas.

Chris' friend at work is due in June 09 and his cousin is due 2 days after me. What the heck was in the water in late summer?? My friend Sara is considering using the new cloth diapers (now without diaper pins!). I'm glad that she is doing the trial run and can tell me about them (she's due in early February). I've never changed a diaper before, so I really won't have a comparison.

Tomorrow is 11 weeks. I go to doctor today to complain about a few things in this crazy rollercoaster of pregnancy, but I doubt it will be anything worth reporting. No fruit sizes right now - I have no idea what I'm up to.

Cravings: A study

So I'm losing weight because in general I cannot think of food without feeling nauseous. I think that is why so many women have to follow their cravings at this time. If I crave something, I'll most likely go and get it; otherwise I might not eat the entire day.

Except for Thursday, when for some reason I was so hungry that I ate my full course lunch of chicken, mashed potatoes and green beans at 10:15 am. I really haven't had any weird cravings yet, but I have wanted a lot mashed potatoes.

I bought a pair of preggo jeans. They have a large stretchy band above the waist that stretches with your growing belly. Chris is jealous - he wishes he could have pants he could just pull up without buttons or zippers. Unfortunately, mine are too big for me at this point. They will probably be useful for 5-9 months. I need to get a smaller pair for 3-4 months and then post-pregnancy.

My super sonic sense of smell has been thoroughly plugged by a violent cold I received from my dear baby daddy. It's probably for the best.

No tomato sauce!

It could be the ravioli, but I'm pretty sure the kid says no on tomato sauce in general.

I dragged Chris to St. Charles to get a 5 year wedding anniversary photo which brought up recollections of getting these photos done as a child and I thought I'd post them here. Courtesy of the TinTypery.

I should add that Chris hates doing these, but is kind enough to do some anyway. I still need to scan and post the Roaring 20s and Western picture (he really hated the Western one) that we did a few years ago. And by some miracle Chris thinks that we should do this again with our kid when s/he's a toddler, and be a 20s gangster family. Y'know, a kid with a gattling gun and a wise guy expression.

Large lime

I'm not sure when we'll get out of the fruit categories. Tomorrow is large lime. Today I'm trying not to do work at my desk during lunch so I am writing this a day early.

I feel good today!? I don't know why, it's kind of scary. Like a false spring.

I learned that if I take my vitamins while stuffing myself then I don't get the vitamin killer stomachache, I just feel gross and overly full. So, happy medium. No cravings either.

What a wonderful discovery! I used to look at the new "handicap" spaces for "expectant mothers" and yell "why do they get special treatment! They got themselves knocked up! Peasant women used to labor in the fields, go into labor in the fields, have the baby, and get back to hoeing. These women can walk a few extra parking spaces!"

yea, well now I get to be handicapped. This Christmas it's all about the expectant mother parking. boo-yea. Do I get one of those special license plate or a tag to hang on my rearview mirror?

People keep asking me if my dad is excited. I don't know, can Joe Winkler ever be excited?? I can't tell what he is. He's just.... Karen's scary dad, as always. Yea what the hell. He's thrilled.

Some people keep asking about whether we are going to find out the gender of baby Baer and possible names. We will find out the gender if s/he is showing us. That will be in early January.

Chris has given up on the idea of his first-born son being named "Athanasius" (Athy for short). He also kicked around Chris Jr. for awhile, but we're not really a "junior" type family. So now he is Michael Philip, at least for now. I always liked the name Theodore, but that would mean that Chris would be constantly doing his Cosby impersonation "Theo, my boy!". Plus, he'd end up as "Teddy Baer".

The girl is a different matter. For the last several years I was determined to name a daughter Elanor, but that is slowly dimming. Now I really like Marian or Charlotte. The middle name would be Teresa, after Chris' mum.

The polls are now open, so cast your votes by commenting below.

Fun with dirt

I spent most of Saturday outside digging in the dirt to plant tulip and daffodil bulbs. Mom and Chris wouldn't let me use the big shovel, so I dug with the little shovel. It took forever. I decapitated many worms.

Sunday I had my 3 oldest friends over to the new house. I was drooled on by little Beatrice (5 months old) who had no trouble eating my fingers but WAILED when I tried to hold her. I declined an invitation to learn how to change a diaper; I do not want to learn until the very last minute. Chris has more experience than me - he changed a diaper at least once before.

Sunday I also learned many things:
1) baby does not like breakfast sausage
2) baby likes squash and dried out pulled pork
3) baby somehow got me to start eating asparagus

I have dandruff for the first time in 20 years and I broke out into hives or a rash all around my neckline. Where is that maternity "glow" I keep hearing about?

Current craving: Tuna salad with egg, mayo and bread and butter pickle.

Small plum!

Today is 8 weeks and my baby is the size of a small plum. S/he went from pea to medium black olive to small plum. I believe next week is a large lime.

I will post all weird cravings as they happen-ish. Monday was mashed potatoes, easily remedied by KFC. Tuesday was fried chicken (when I drove down 70 through downtown, it smelled like blackened chicken - 3 weeks ago it smelled like fish and 2 weeks ago it smelled like doughnuts). Yesterday I really wanted a corn dog (no hot dogs for me, wah!). This morning I wanted toast with butter and jelly. But who is to say that these are actually new cravings or that I just feel more inclined to obey them now that I have an excuse?

Chris is adorable and extremely helpful. It's hard not to be infuriated at this boost of chivalry, but nice to have an excuse not to carry the laundry basket or bring in groceries. I need to seal my driveway and my deck stairs, does anyone need some extra cash? I'm not allowed to perform such labor intensive tasks, and Chris denies any knowledge of handy-man tasks.

Now when we go places Daddy says stuff like "this is baby's first trip to the grocery store", without realizing that baby made his first trip many places before we realized that there was a baby. He's so very excited and has great big plans (he's talking about investing, yikes!). I couldn't be happier by his attitude or support.


Here's that picture so I don't have to keep sending it around through email.


I still want some toast, can anyone get me a piece of toast????

Disclaimer

what's a blog? Did someone sneeze?

Here is my disclaimer -

Those familiar with the Ireland Chronicles understand my writing style. Those who are not familiar with them please understand that much of this is stream of conscioussness and I do not spend any time proofreading the material as I have to do enough of that at my job. I will not gross anyone out but I will not refrain from any honest feelings and am physically unable to keep out any and all sarcasm, even when writing of my blossoming family. Happy? Enjoy.